Christian Therapy: Acceptance versus Failure (Part 2 of 4).

Greetings. How do you view problems? As a Christian, and as a person, what are your thoughts, feelings, reactions to problems in life? Do you try to always fix problems viewing them as bad or wrong? Do you see a problem in your life, a problem in others, or a problem in a relationship as something that is bad and needs to be fixed?

I would like for you to consider this radical idea: To begin, all problems in your life needs to be accepted. Whatever the problem is, and in how this problem is affecting your life, needs to be accepted as reality. If you are experiencing problems in your emotional life, your relationship life, your work life, your family life, whatever the arena that you are experiencing some difficulty or problem, the first reaction needs to be one of acceptance.

And way is that? Because all problems that are not first viewed as acceptance will be viewed as failure. If we do not accept life’s problems than we will always be on the hunt to fix or solve life’s problems due to our perception that they are bad or wrong. When we fail to accept something, we than will react to a problem as bad that has to be corrected or fixed.

The challenge is this: We all tend to swing back and forth from seeing problems as either all good or all bad and the result is that we cannot have a consistent relationship with ourselves or others due to our view that problems cannot be accepted. If you have a problem in life, it has to be fixed and if not, than one will falsely conclude you are not handling your life.

So when a problem is not accepted, it is seen as bad. For example, let’s say you are 20 pounds overweight, and you view these 20 pounds as a problem that needs to be fixed and the gaining of these 20 pounds is bad or wrong. So these 20 pounds will get viewed as bad and not acceptable. Since you demand perfection, than that which is not good and accepted is viewed as bad and is rejected.

The challenge then is to accept the realization of the battle between good and bad, the perfect self-versus the real self, and the difference between acceptance and failure. What does not get accepted will be viewed as a failure based upon your perception that acceptance only happens when problems are solved. If a problem persists, you will not allow this and you will start to conclude that you are a failure as you cannot tolerate problems not being fixed.

Thanks for reading and if you need help with acceptance, than give me a call as I would love to help you find acceptance in life versus the feelings of failure that you are feeling as unacceptable. Accept life as it comes and find ways to accept problems as they are. Once you do this, than we can set a course of how to change them.